christinafarina

Happy Easter everyone!!!

I'm very upset how low key easter is these days. There isn't even an easter bunny in the mall anymore! I hope when i have kids i can keep that youngness in them for as long as possible.

Hmm..let's see what updates do i have for you?

Well the school year is coming to an end which can only mean one thing. STRESS. lol.
I have a group project for advertising and i hate hate HATE group projects. We have to spend $10,000 dollars of a company's money. Trust me it sounds easy, and i never thought i'd say this, but it's extremely hard to spend someone else's money.CAN'T I JUST BUY SHOES!? lol.

I have a lot of tests coming up such as Ethics, Music, Hollywood Musical, and Theology in addition to the stupid advertising. ahhh i HATE the end of the year.

the dreaded bathing suit season is upon me. I'm still trying to trim down my thighs and my tummy.i hate bathing suits.

I went to see the Odd Couple on Broadway last week with my friend Cassy. We had front row seats AND we met Matthew Broderick! He's so cute and shy and down to earth. Definitely an experience to remember.

Other then all of that, i'm just preparing for the pageant and trying to keep my head on without losing it with all the stuff that i have to do.

Any suggestions on what song to sing for the pageant? I need something up tempo i think. Any show stopping ideas?

i love dunkin donuts tea.
i hate when people can eat what they want and not gain weight.
it's not their fault but i wish it was me lol.
i love macaroni and cheese
i hate broken hearts
i love to dance
i hate the grimeballs that love it too.
i love velour outfits
i especially love victoria secret velour outfits
i hate my bangs
i love makeup and all things girly
i wish i had nails to fulfill my urges to get a manicure
i love shampoo that smells nice
i hate when shampoo doesn't smell fruity
i LOVE MAC makeup.
i hate that i cant afford it.
i love beauty days
i'm especially happy because i have to get my hair done soon.
i love when shampoo people wash you hair.
my shampoo boy massages my head, does yours?
i love plays.
i love to watch plays.
i love to be in plays.
i wish there was a play on SI to be in.
i love warm weather
i love NY
i love shopping
i hate shopping with no money
i love yoga
i hate falling during yoga
i love to wash my hair
i hate when i forget the last time i washed my hair
i hate when i forget the last time i wash my hair, wash it anyway, and realize i did it that afternoon.
i love the color pink
i hate when everyone acts like they love the color pink (unless they really do)
i love bright colors
i think the color grey has potential.
i love to crack my back
i hate that i cant crack the left side of my back
i love to hug people
i hate when i dont get the hug back
i love to love.
i hate when people don't love me back.
i love my friends, i love life, i love me <33

So i'm thinking about the fact that my next birthday i'm going to be 21. yeah i know, you're saying TURN 20 FIRST FOR GODS SAKE! lol but im thinking about it anyway. i can't wait to go to the culture club lol. it's so sad that THAT'S the one thing i want to do. Most people want to go out and get drunk on their 21st birthday but not me, i want to go dance at some club where pac man is above the door.

another thing i can't wait for is going to applebees and finally being able to order one of those awesome looking drinks in the cool cups. i can't wait. ahhhh.

i'm making it easy on all my friends, so now you guys know in a year and a half I WANT TO GO TO CULTURE CLUB!

Damn i can't believe i'm going to be 20 years old though. That means i'll have been living for 2 decades. the next big leap is 30. jeez. this is crazy.

o yeah so i have a friggin virus on my computer. i got an IM from one of my friends and against my will i opened it up and now all i have is popups, day and night, night and day. you would think that since i worked in a computer lab the problem would be fixed already but there's also a crack down the middle of my screen that i have yet to fix so we'll see how long this takes....

so yeah, who has hopped on this myspace bandwagon. this shit is insane. everytime i think of deleting it, i get a new comment and am sucked right back in.

hmmm i don't know what else i want to say...but i'll be back. have a nice day guys :-D

well i have returned from my Bloomingdales extravaganza. i didn't get tons and tons of clothes and i didnt manage to transform it into $200 BUT i bought two things that i absolutely love.

The first thing i bought was a pair of mignight blue velvet pants.SIZE 26 WAIST! that is HUGE for me. Possibly the smallest i have ever been. They were reduced from $162 to $21 bucks! that was crazy and they look awesome.

the last thing i bought was a CRAZY buy. It was so crazy, i'm definitely going to have to post some pictures for you guys. While on my fervent search for good deals i walked past the register and the racks that have all of the things people returned or didn't want by the time they got up to the register. I did a double take and went back. I saw this adorable, waist length leather jacket. Now leather is against my whole moral view on animals but this was amazingly adorable. Of course there are those instances where the size isn't right or the style isnt right, shoulders too high, too boring you know the drill but not this time. This time it was different. When i put that jacket on it was absolutely positively PERFECT. Then the demise set in. I looked at theprice tag and it said $170. That was way past my budget even at 30% off. I continued to hang on to it though just because i couldn't bear the thought of anyone else having this jacket.

After a good 30 minutes of carrying this around i figured , since it was getting so heavy, that i should just check the price at the register being that once my ears realized it was $170 my hands would allow me to put it down. So i get to the front and give it to the clerk. She scans it for me and as the eyes pop out of her head she says, "This jacket is $73.00!" Well i don't think i have to say i went mildly crazy, silently of course. To think that hearing the price would make me put it down it only made me want it more.

I must have tried it on about 3 more times for both my mom and my aunt. They both were pushing me to get it.I think the final straw must have been when the sales lady told me it was the last one in the store and she wasn't joking. I looked and it was true. Someone had just returned it. I went to the register and with a final price of $60, the leather jacket belonged to me.

(i can secretly tell you that i danced to "the one that i want" from Grease with red stillettos around my house pretending i was Sandy)

THAT in a nutshell was my shopping extravaganza. ahh shopping<333

Ok people I've been gone for like ever but this time because of 2006, i'm turning over a new leaf and i'm going to update my journal with pictures and all that good stuff. I'm going to work on my own lay out and everything not getting help from anyone because i'm sure as everyone knows, you can't rely on any one or anything.

2006 is going to be a year of change for me. I will be in a bikini by May, i'm going to take dancing lessons, and i'm going to look into different colleges. You know when you go through that point in your life when the normal just isn't ok for you anymore? Like you know that you were given talents and gifts for a reason and it would be such a shame to waste them. So that is the new year well at least the outlook on the new year.

I might as well update you all about me and my life up to this point. Most of you know that my name is Christina and i am 19 years old. I am now a college sophomore at St.John's University. School is alright but it doens't have what i love most and that is theater. I have wanted to be on a Broadway stage since i saw Beauty and the Beast when i was 13 years old. I love to act, sing and dance(slightly well) on stage. Whenever i see a play i just get lost in what is going on. I love getting drawn into this world that is portrayed on a simple stage. Everything about the stage excites me and that's why when I'm around it, i feel like i belong there. Not only with the people but with the atmosphere and all that surrounds it.

I've always considered myself a little different then others and more of a role model to anyone then some of the trash that's representing the world today. With this in mind i decided to enter the Miss Staten Island pageant in November and managed to nab Miss Photogenic 2006 which is a huge honor. I can't wait to try again next year. The whole experience was wonderful and i met so many great girls. This is something that when it is said is never believed but by doing this pageant i was able to open my mind to all sorts of people with all sorts of dreams and aspirations. I had an awesome time.( i'll post some pics of that too)

I've been with my boyfriend Jeff for 3 years now. It's the same guy that i've always posted about. Relationships are tough but when you're with someone that you know you love somehow all of the trials aren't so bad.(pics to come)

My life is pretty simple at this point but complex at the same time. It's like i live this normal life but i have so many aspirations and so many fears that i will accomplish none of them.

I will finish this post later, i'm starting on some work that my boss just gave me. Comment if you like.

Welcome back to me!!!

Did you ever just feel...tired? Like just ever feel tired of everyone and everything. Lately it's the way i've been feeling. And the worst part, did you ever try to shake that feeling but you just can't and you slowly begin to accept that this is the way things are?

I'm tired of friends. i'm tired ofpeople. i'm tired of being taken advantage of.

things are going to change.

i can't allow myself to be taken like this. So from now on, i'll just sit and wait. sit and wait until people have time for me. until people treat me like the friend or person i deserve to be treated like. i hate being pushed aside like i'm absolutely some shit on the street.

so i'll just sit and wait. i can't try to do things anymore that people don't want to do.

And you know after this post, people will IM me and ask me what's wrong. and i'llsay nothing because i'm tired. i wont answer until i'm good and ready.

i think i need to just be by myself for a while.

Happy 19th birthday Christina!!!

Today Me, Christina, Laura and Jessica went to Point Plesant in New Jersey for christina's birthday. I had sooo much fun. What was so annoying was that the fucking weather man said it wasgunna be really hot, like94 degrees and it ended up being like 83 with no sun just clouds all day. We made the best of it though. We played in the water and King Triton got back at me for yelling at him. Then we walked on the boardwalk where i was the master of the crane machine. i won a fat little..thing...her name is amiela.

When we left the beach, we went back to SI and christina,laura and jessica all got something done at the tatoo parlor. I'm poor and couldn't afford $30 to get my ear lobes pierced so i watched and got nervous for everyone else.

All and all it was an awesome day!! Pictures soon to follow!!

Happy birthday again!!<333

Me and Christina went to go see the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants tonight! I've never read the books but the movie was SO adorable! I remember what it was like at 16 years old to have 3 best friends that would do anything for eachother. Now that we're almost 19 things have...changed... but i'm not sure if it's for better or if it's for worse. i mean at one point it was like this one little happy group.no cares no worries, worried about nothing except having fun with each other but somewhere along the line that changed too. all of a sudden it was who was saying what about the other? and who didn't invite who this and that place. sometimes i would sit and think of how great it would be to go back to that. like to go back to that one point in time when i was so careless and actually liked and cared about people. i don't know when it happened that i just stopped. people get so wrapped up in wondering what the other isthinking or wondering what this one orthat one is saying. don't get me wrong, i used to wonder about that shit alll the time..i used to sit and wonder what everyone thought about me and think of all the things that were goin on with out me. then one day, im not even sure when, noneof it mattered anymore. i mean i started college and the year carried on by in a flash. i guess even though it flew by i grew up a lot. i cared about those who cared about me. i forgot the past yet it seemed as though the rest of the world wanted to hang onto it. the way i see things now is that the past is the past and the future is what u make of it. for me there is no highschool. there was only that year when i was 16 years old...it seems so strange to say that i feel old but i just do in so many ways. like people willcome up to me with things that mayb 2 years ago seemed so real and important and now its like whatever. i've become something but something that i'm not really sure i know what it is. maybe we can't hold on to the past because i guess it was when we were silly and could laugh at life but now itslike things are so serious. who has work this day and who can take off that day. when did we surrender ourselves to 8 hours a day sitting behind a desk or doing something so pointless to our hearts? We had a life of dreams and i guess in a way we still do and can still make it all happen but i guess their right when they say "enjoy it now" i just wished i enjoyed 16 alittle bit more. and i think i would have if i could have looked into my future and saw what would have happened.

i think what happened in two years could be referred to as liberation. the feeling that you don't need anyone and the feeling that all you need is those who care for you and those who really connect with you. however, thereis still thatfeeling of deep nostalgia as u travel back to those years but hey you can cherish the memory that what once was, cant you? i can't say i'm not happy now. i'm very happy with my life and with the fact that no matter how hard people may try i will not let them get me down. i know tht my life is what i make of it and being with th epeople i consider special enough to be a part of it.

this is not a post to call anyone or anything out. it's not even about anyone. it's just about feelings that justhappened to keep coming out as i typed. i think tis is the first time i used livejournal as a pathway into letting my feelings out. it feels good to let it all out.

lol tonight me and christina saw these two fat ladies that were best friends and went to see the movie. it was moving lol. and we were like us in 20 years but only thinner. Yes, sis, us in 20 years is right. best friends forever<333

ok long time no post. this time i have a question for all you readers.

I'm doing a report at school for my final exam. The paper is going to be on teenage girls and the pressure magazines put on them to look perfect or just like the models that they see in the magazines. I need to get some quotes from both guys and girls so if you guys could comment to me that would really help me a whole lot. There are two separate questions that i'm asking each the the girls and the guys.

Girls:

Do you feel that magazines put a lot of pressure on you to look "perfect?" Do you feel that you would go to major circumstances to get yourself to that image?
(girls when answering this don't just pick one, pick one and give an explanation why)

Guys:

What is your type of woman? To make it easier, If you were to see two girls walking down the street, both equally beautiful , and one was ultra skinny while the other was proportioned more like a woman with a shapely body, which would be the one that you go for?
(guys when answering this don't just pick one, pick one and give an explanation why)

i would really appreciate if you guys would help me with this, it's for a pretty big grade so i have to make it good.

Also before i go i want to let everyone know that i'm not trying to put down anyone, i'm just trying to get some honest opinions on the subject and expose magazines for a good grade.

Well its Monday... January 31st..first off happy birthday to jeff's mom. Second off let's celebrate cuz January is almost over! I have always despised January for many reasons. Like first it's right after Christmas so it's almost like you're mad at January for happening since there are no more presents or food, unless u have a january birthday in which you are excluded. Then it's always the beginning of something, may it be school, or work, or resolutions that everyone is going to break. I would much rather just continue what i was doing, it makes things easier. On a side note, i just swapped for a Diet Dr. Pepper. I love having extra change. Life if good. It really does taste like Dr. Pepper.

Now that February is coming it's time for commercial holidays such as Valentines Day. This brings me to a question, like guys are supposed to buy their girlfriends, mothers, sisters but do girls have to buy for brothers and dads? Any of you fellow live journalers have plans for valentines day?

The superbowl which i never participate in yet since i am surrounded by a male dominated work staff i bet money. Now i gotta buy a jersey. Cool. That's what i'm mainly focused on, is how to make football look cute. I don't understand it, i mean for god sakes i just learned baseball, in which i like now.

Groundhog day which is cool cuz i like the ground hog but i think its bullshit. I think the groundhog is probably like oh shit whats up with this holiday. I always predict Spring. i hate the stupid winter, i hope it dies.

I'm so very hungry because i havn't eaten all day, i only made cookies for everyone in which Ryan finished off all by himself.
One thing i notice about this computer lab is that the main focus is food. You would think there would be a main focus on computer technology but not really. We start the morning out talking about food, and continue to speak about what we're going to eat and then we order and then talka bout diets as we eat not to mention we make coffee and/or hot chocolate every morning.

My friend dropped off the driver's manual today so i will begin my extensive study of the driving world. lol oh shit.

I need to post pics soon.. it's becoming necessary.

<333

so here i am at work bored out of my mind.since i was sick for so long i have to make up the hours that i missed when i took off. So in order to do that i've been working late nights until 10 everynight, and will be doing that for the next week and a half.blah:(

so the new semester kicked off and so far i like it a lot. to me it seems like it's a lot better then last semester was but not because like i was so new to the school, well i guess maybe that had something to do with it, but also now i like all of my teachers a lot. They seem cool, but it's still early in the semester. I'm taking acting this semester so instead of switching campuses i'm gunna see how i like the whole acting thing. As of now everything is going great, like i'm learning a whole bunch of techniques and stuff that i can use when i'm on the stage. Auditions for the play are in February but i'm not sure if i should audition because i have heard that it's judged unfairly, but we'll see.

O my god, am i the only one who has absolutely no money and is living paycheck to paycheck? i swear i owe money everywhere and its like when i wait my 2 weeks and i get my check i have to give it all away, it totally sucks so much.

i started to study for my driver's permit test. i kno i kno i've heard from all over, a monkey could pass that test. But like i really dont know much about the road and i want to know it to the best of my ability. I dont want to be getting into accidents or being one of those drivers that people dread to be on the road with. I want to take driving lessons in edition to the 5 hour class as well. The only problem is is sometimes i think whats the point of learning how to drive when i dont even have a car or for that matter the money to buy a car. i got a deal pending on a car as ofnow but i dont think anything will come of it just for the reason that my dad refuses to put me on his insurance. that shit annoys me so much and jess will know how i feel.like i sit here all day and am refused the right to drive but then when i want to go somewhere like to the mall or jeff's house or a friend's house or whatever they bitch and complain to no end. like to no end. like whats the point of me not driving if your going to bitch and complain about having to drive me places. its brought upon themselves. it was always you have to wait till you're older like mike (my bro) did . but now that i am going to be 19 years old that was the year mike started to drive and the panic begins for them. there is a whole new set of rules, like now they wont put me on their insurance because if i get into an accident we'll lose our house or something. on the other hand they kno i cant afford my own insurance so they win. i can never understand what parents dont get about kids needing to drive or needing to have a little freedom. college+18= adult? hell the fuck no.

and another thing, can someone please comment back to my posts. some people post jsut to vent which is what i do also, but sometimes i like to get feedback, i like to get advice on what to do.

begging for comments, how sad is that.

updatee timeee

well as you can all see, my friend from school angela passed away on January 5. She was in a car accident but was the passenger and apparently her and the driver hit into a utility pole at like 12 am. So like can you tell me why does such sad things have to happen in order for the ordinary human being to recognize how precious life truly is? I mean out of how many hundreds of students in school that could have had an accident, she was the one to have it happen to her. When i found out what happened i really looked at my life. Like it made me think how important it really is to live each day to the fullest. Don't be afraid of life, don't be afraid of what might happen because who knows in that very next instance if you'll even be breathing? Like i was watching tv and there was this commercial for life insurance, it sounds dumb but like this commercial upset me so much. It showed this guy and how he was getting ready to go to work and how he had a wife and kids and they were so happy. During all of this the narrator was like in 10 minutes this man will die in a fatal car crash. Like people wake up and go about their days without even realizing that in 10 minutes it could be you in that fatal car crash, or it could be you have something happen to you. I guess in a way it could be a morbid way to look at life but on the other hand it could be a light to us as well. I mean how many times a day do we leave our house and not bother to say i love you or something kind? How many of us leave the house on a bad note or thinking something nasty about someone else? You never truly realize the power of a good thought or a couple of words and the amount of true fullness they could bring.We spend so many hours a day harking upon how many so called problems we have and how much stress we have in which most of the time we bring upon ourselves. It hurts to think that the death of a loved one can really make u stop for a second and realize maybe your life isnt so bad and maybe it's worth celebrating far more then you celebrate it now. Anyway, sorry to bring this all up to you guys who read my journal, i just felt it was important for you all to know that you should live your life to the fullest as well as make sure to let the people you love around you know that you care each time you get the chance to. I figure it's better to hear it from me then to learn it when that person close to your heart gets taken away from you.
I love you all<333

Rest in Peace Angela Abuan

October 12, 1986-January 5, 2005

Noone can understand why such a young and beautiful life had to be taken away. Maybe we're not meant to understand,and maybe we never will understand but the one thing i do know is what a wonderful, beautiful, caring,kind and compassionate person you truly were. Even though we just met this year, all of that shined from your eyes.i am truly sad we now aren't allowed to become better friends on earth, but hey i guess having an angel on your side isn't all that bad huh? Rest in Peace Angela, i will miss you now and forever.

**Alright, Ok**(LoL)
<333333333333333333

here i am updating my journal, wow its been a hell of a long time.

Catching up on like everything. The first semester of freshman year is over. It went by so incredibly fast it isnt even funny. I just finished finals and got good on everything except for math in which i got a C+ but my overall is a 3.2 so i guess thats pretty good, right?

Me and Jeff are still together and our two year anniversary is coming up this friday! I cant believe it's been two years already. We've got our christmas presents and have probably spent insane amounts on each other but hey, isnt that what christmas is all about lol. On Friday we're gunna go into the city and see the tree and whatnot and hes taking me to this place that he knows about to eat. It's nothing fancy. I mean we were gunna do the whole fancy thing but then i was like Jeff this isn't us so we scratched that. Plus being that both of us are picky eaters the fact that all the nice restaurants are prix fixe menus so there are all these outlandish things that show up on the menus when all we really want are mozzarella sticks and chicken cutlets.

On Thursday is my office christmas party. It's at arirang and i've never been there so it should be a lot of fun. I'm bringing Stina, Jess and my other friend Jess. So it's gunna be a girls night out with Christina Christina Jessica and Jessica. LoL. How weird is that.

I have SO many bills to pay it isnt even funny. Credit Cards, Parent loans, ebay. It's absolutely insane.

I cannot believe that Christmas is here already. Damn. But i finished all of my shopping which is a shocker and i spent and arm and a leg to get them but hey whatever. I get so excited when i buy people things.

I want to start saving up for driver's ed, cuz i can't take like always relying on my parents. It's really annoying cuz then their like o well we cant take you here today, your always asking us. Well mom and dad you never let me drive so dont complain when i ask you to drive me places.

I've got a few calls about me and getting into the theater. My friend's father is on brodway and he wants to see all of my headshots and hear a demo of my voice and the people that i sing with in church are like professional people and want me to train with a professional trainer. So things seem to be falling into place.

I'm at work right now waiting for the hours to pass lol. From 8:30-3:00 but it's fun. We're gunna build a gingerbread house in the back so today should be pretty cool.

Anyways, gunna get back to work now. Fa la la la la la la la la

Happy Birthday Girls!

I hope all your dreams come true on your special day.<33